David and Goliath

            This piece is an advice to the numerous Indian youth just like me. If we do not act quickly we might have to face oblivion or bitter tastes of failure and insult.

Everyone knows the allegory of David and Goliath and many of my colleagues, decorated vets of the editing team may find this example childish. But this can prove to be a contemporary personification in the world politics. And yes I am talking about India and china and their mellifluous relationship a consortium of lies and deceit.

            Many of us might argue that this is an unjust example of the world scenario. But I would like to quote only one thing to them “well can’t you see that each and every kernel of the Indian society is breached by corruption, take the CWG for example”. But yes, if we try and seclude ourselves of the irony we will realize that things are getting worst.

            “History repeats itself” a statement that has proved itself on and over time and yet again the world is standing on the cusp of a cold war, one whose victor will become the superpower of the world. But do not be pleased by finding India in race to being a superpower. In this case David’s slingshot is plagued by corruption, un-education, poverty and overpopulation. It’s like showing to the world our ignorance towards contraceptives and bribing.

            While on the other hand goliath being bigger in size is still increasing its strength economic, military and social. This has been its forte since its inception. A strategy to surround India by befriending its rivals and providing them nukes in spite of worldwide objections clearly shows its motive. Spoiling the brats across the border and encouraging them in fueling terrorism and naxalitism has unveiled china’s true identity. With immense workforce and mammoth projects like the Brahmaputra dam, are acting as a wakeup call for every Indian. With the prime ministers laptop breached by Chinese hackers and uncorroborated reports of communication losses with ISRO’S INSAT 4B, dominating India at every stratum, it would be an understatement that “we are in trouble”.

            It’s a faceoff between fiendish and veiled communalism and a corrupt and failing democracy. How much we argue the facts state that in case of a war, there would be no place for us to hide our asses. This can be clearly depicted by India’s situation in the world politics. Being the second biggest and population and army it still has no place in the UN Security Council, one recently allotted that too temporary just to keep us happy in our bubble, a bubble in which the struggle of a normal Indian is confined to bread and cloth and shelter if he’s in luck.

            This is not a demoralizing article rather a demeaning one showing us who we really are.  If this David needs to survive the goliath and his minions he’ll have to bring about a socio-economic revolution or else face oblivion. With the tag of a third world country slowly fading away I urge every youth, even one with iotic feelings of pseudo-love for his country to realize his responsibilities and help in ameliorating India’s situation instead of updating his/her status on facebook.

“WE THE YOUTH HAVE IMMENSE ENERGY AND STRENGTH, WHICH IF WE PUT IN ARDUOUS EFFORTS AND HARNESS NO RED NATION WILL EVER THINK OF CROSSING US AND SURVIVING ON OUR BEST DAY.“

A crucial article for everyone, Please read through, Have you been robbed?

                

                So, guys when I ask this question: what is the first thing that comes to your mind? It will be money or something dear like a personal belonging. But here I am talking of the property we all have an immense potential in, but which is often left to rot and is seldom paid attention to.

                Yes, I am talking of innovation. Innovation which is the very gist of success. The one asset that each and everyone of us has been bestowed with. But, one which we tend to lose as we advance in lives.

                So by now many users must have decided that this article is of no use to them. But if allowed to write so in the heading this article can change you lives if you still have the ability to learn from it. I am not being preachy, I am just sharing my experiences, those that have come from toilsome efforts.

                Yes this article is about the INDIAN EDUCATION SYSTEM showcasing its pros and cons and ultimately relating it your lives and how can you start winning. If you can derive some inspiration from it. But first we must address the most important question. What is education. Many of us might argue that they know it meaning but very less really understand it.

                Education is the process by which society deliberately transmits its accumulated knowledge, skills and values from one generation to another. Well this is the definition what I found on wiki but do we understand the real aspects of education.

                How many of you remember your school. We will deny due to our natural tendencies but deep down we ourselves know that we crammed the answers not knowing what they meant. This is the primary drawback of the indian system. We are forced to learn by a stick. Seldom our we left alone in the world to learn things on our own out of enthusiasm and curiosity. From the moment a child is born he/she starts learning a process which is life long. But then why are we made to cram things and not to reason and develop an individual thought. One which might prove more helpful than a replica of answers in the answer copies. Eventually it becomes our tendency to just cram things and vomit it on the exam sheets without even understanding anything and that is why we get robbed of our ability to INNOVATE. We become like servile toadies that do whats commanded not paying heed to the reason or cause.

                I am sure many of you must be thinking that you know this and this issue has largely being discussed and even portrayed in movies like 3 idiots, but very rarely do people realize that we are having an edge over other countries not because of what we know, but the amount that we are taught forcefully or what we have crammed in our schools. But how useful is such education. That is why we perform exceptionally well when kept in a free environment where we have  freedom to innovate and think out of the box. The very reason most people going abroad start performing well, not because they crammed more, but they no longer remain in a system that drains innovation.

                Counter acting to this situation can be the toughest part. Our situation is like a paralytic trying to finish a marathon. But to break the shackles of convention and rise to become an innovator is the very purpose of man, a divine endeavor for which we were bestowed with such a brain. Try and innovate every day. It can be a new way to do a task, fun ways of doing chores innovate daily. When learning, do it for the sake of learning and not for getting marks. If such is your situation, this kind of education wont help you in the long run and so why do it. Rather invest time in more meaningful pursuits, ones which you love and those things that come naturally. Try and convince others including your parents, as if you cannot convince those who love you the most, for what you love doing the most, what’s the point in pursuing such targets.

                In the end its we who will have to change. Its high time we kept putting the blame on others and cowering from our responsibilities. We must change in order to change the world. If you want to win INNOVATE.

Youth “utho jago, sangharsh karo”

         They say time and tide wait for none. Well, it’s high time our youth realize this. Youth is potential, capable, strong and defiant. These are all recommended features if one needs to prove his mettle out in the open. These are the structural elements of youth empowerment and coherent productive development. Only, the youth is increasingly failing to realize this.

I sincerely want to bring your attention to another evil that has thrown us at the cusp of debilitation. It’s the rapidly evolving youth. Wait! Evolving is a good thing you must think. Don’t you? Well, it is. Not if it’s regressive instead of progressive. The youth today has become deeply hardwired to pleasure of the senses. They are poked into their laptops day in day out. They are becoming increasingly addicted to the social networking bubble. Facebook alone has 500 million active users most of which are youth that log on to it ever hour. Not for some constructive thought propaganda. But to update their status and profile pics. Wonder what would happen if they forget to do it someday? Evolving with technology sounds good till you see millions of young productive minds getting engulfed by it. Besides time kill, social networking has been proven to bring in a narcissistic element too. Smugness and counter productivity. It’s like bread and pickle. I am sure you can see how pathetic it would taste?

         Along side the networking bubble, comes the element of mental, paternal and to a large extent, peer pressure that starts eating through a ripening urban mind’s neural connections. Running, comes a helper. No no! Don’t relax. It looks like a helper but is a stronger destroyer. What starts as a casual try out among a high income youth slowly permeates to all sections of the society. It’s drug use and it’s abuse. Cannabis, being the most frequently abused drugs in India, mostly by the ‘educated’ youth. The disintegration of the old joint family system, absence of parental love and care in modern families, and a fiasco of old moral and religious values leads to rise in drug addicts. Youth consume drugs because of a false belief that they’ll be able to overcome the harsh realities of life.

And I can go on quoting innumerable examples of time and self killing by our productive youth. But what’s the point. We need to realize that this is the time for us. The most productive session of our lives. Stringent education system can reinstate the faith in self thus eradicating the need to resort to external measures of self destruction. Youth have the potential to take this country to heights never imagined. Here are some suggestions to save the youth from the path of devastation

We have got to spend more time with friends. Not the virtual internet ones. But the real ones.

Parents : Please take care of us. We know you have jobs but we want to have jobs too.

         We need to form a mastermind group that enhances our intellectual growth. There are 6 billion people on this planet. I am sure someone is looking for each one us.

Stay as far away from drugs or the ones who even smell them.

Have beliefs.

Hindi ki Chindi : rated rt

        Well how many of us know when is HINDI DIWAS. It’s on the 14^th of September every year, which we as proud patriots should know. You might be able to remember it with the event that occurs 3 days after the 9/11 mornings. We all take pride to introduce HINDI as our nation language but take very less pains to speak it or to encourage it. As common people you too can raise a question – “Why is he preaching so much. Has he forgotten he too is using English to express hi views”. Well the answer is in form of a rhetorical question itself “would you even read that article if it be in pure Hindi”, if your answer is yes and you really think you would put arduous efforts to look up the tough words in a “HINDI DICTIONARY” there’s hope.

“Chalo chaaddo yaar, apne ko kya karna”. Now let me get to the real article. Well we Indians take pride in adopting things. We are quick to adopt things as if our own, English not an exception. We overdo such things so much that we forget what we had in the first place. Hindi is our mother tongue, we say it with pride. But many of us face a lisp when they speak “MATRA BHASHA”. Our affinity for foreign things has led us to forget our native ones. In the lines for pizzas and burgers we have forgotten the taste of puran poli. So much that Indian govt. had to open a university just to save the flavors of India that are getting extinct. English is a language required everywhere. Without it our future is questionable. But its dominance in the literary field has put Hindi in shackles once again.

        The present culture has led us to forget the fact that sounded in 1947 as one of our freedom slogans “HINDI HAI HUM”. Well how Hindi are we now. Maybe “HINDLISH HAI HUM” cause we fail to realize that we have lost the capacity to speak even one sentence without using an English word. Well we have even lost track of all the no. of vowels and consonants in HINDI.

Every reader, I know, must be thinking why he is being so preachy. Well the answer lies around us in the cornucopia of problems we, as a country are facing now. Demoralizing problems like corruption, overpopulation, uneducation have led us to start liking other powerful countries. We want to follow the pop culture and become oblivious to the plague corrupting our nation. We are strengthening the conspiracy theory that it’s a US plan to implant English so deep that people cannot even speak their native languages without uttering a word of English. Well if it was a plan, hell it got successful. People nowadays take pride of talking with their kids in English, not with a purpose of educating them with a language which the will have to inevitably learn to survive. But people have started to look down upon the language. English authors of contemporary India feel as well as find their stature far above those of Hindi. Politicians of our own country tagging others as “HINDI BHASHI” and banishing them, disposing them out as if casting out lepers has became the trend in modern India.

        Being a satirical page I donot expect any changes in the readers. But if you have made it so far not feeling disgusted of yourself, then probability you are too practical for such national notions or lack the capacity to connect. But in the end, remembering and revering is all that we can do to our mother tongue and this is the only message I wanted to implant in the entire reader’s minds. “Venerate your mother tongue” is the latent message of this satirical page named IRREVERANCE”.

 P.S. for all those patient readers who were able to make it till the end RT means revolutionary thoughts

Office love stories : the feel of the small editing house i used to work in

        For all those who love my articles, this article might be coming from beyond the grave. My recent maverick (learn a new word today) attitude for the myMO editing team, on facebook has put me on everyone’s crosshair. But you cannot change your basic instinct, the rude and stubborn man I am. 

It was one fine day of a team meet that I realized something fishy was going on. I could see intermittent burst of perky smiles being passed from one side of the command chain to the other. It took my excessively sharp reflexes to point out that Mr. Lemon has passed an encrypted message to Ms. Elan. If you are smart enough you would be able to decrypt my use of names and voila. But yes, close quarters, long working hours and a sense of comfort had lit something. Yes friends and it was that fine day that I sat down pondering on this topic.

        We have couples in our class and office as well. But do you guys ever felt angry because of the nauseating feeling that comes when your friend calls “sweetie” or any other cheesy nickname. If yes, then welcome folks to my world. This page provides me a haven to release my frustration. Now coming back to the topic, such incidents of attraction towards the opposite sex create barriers for working. You cannot express resentment over others work just because they are someones “fanti or fanta”. I hate this as it deteriorates my work quality (if I have any). But the true fact is just because I can’t get a pie to eat I’ll spit in my friend’s. Yes, that my nature of which I am proud of.

         Connecting this to us engineers, we have been blessed by the faculty’s narrow-minded approach of giving less sessionals to the couples, which kind of suppresses its epidemic spread. But there is no such barrier when the boss himself can hit on his employees. Coming back to the editing team, we had 2 couples in it. The first I have mentioned above. The one, that passes smiles, works together, defends each others views, attends parties together and does everything that a sukhi dampati does, except for the things that I cannot talk about.

        The second couple is a figment on my imagination. From which us single team members derive funfrom. Their relationship as friends provides people like us with “masala” to brighten up the office’s morbid atmosphere and lighten it up with spurs of giggles and expressions. This leaves the poor couple speculating and asking themselves why all these double meaning questions are coming towards them.

The best thing you can find is the blush when you say, “Yeh Mr. Lemon (long naughty break) Elan”. And then a series of explanations that follow. Sometimes such leg-pulling even ignites the dormant fire, but seldom does it happens.

        In the end, it’s the human tendency to flirt and to find a partner having the same pay grade, one with whom you have worked, give rise to such affairs. “Kya main chalun ghar tak, it’s late” and “have you had something to eat” questions that provide us with loads of material to create comedy and laugh and show our productivity in office.

The magnanimous dose of emotions that comes in iotic packets of IRONY

             With all due respect, according to our dear, satirical, cynical, a stickler and a tyranny, Mr. Attention to detail chief editor of the youth news letter i write in - “Irony is emotionless”. I beg to differ as it blazes a firestorm of emotions in oneself. When petty things veiled in the weightless cloth of irony are blasphemed, their mere effects tend to dissolve. But the same weapon can hack ones self esteem and a weapon which is often used by friends rather than foe. 

             Coming to the lighter side, nothings better than the lightness and breeze that is generated by a sitcom which uses the same topic in discussion – yes Irony. Since it’s my engrafted duty to uphold artistic and naive nature of this page, and to try and make myself useful to all our readers, the essence of great literally works lies in the very irony which our nubile young minds fail to grasp and one’s masterpiece starts to appear as a jeremiad.  Therefore it becomes ones salient duty to help others in route to such atrocities and kill their pain just by increasing it. Yeah!! I wasn’t serious up their. What can you expect from a writer who writes about sitoliya and gilly danda! Well if you nutless monkeys have done so I have a cool piece of advice. GREAT LITERALLY WORKS ARE BEST SEEN FROM BEHIND THE BARS OF THE MUSEUM. If you find yourself reading one, this article may help you speculate what’s irony all about. It’s about saying a thing and meaning entirely the different. Sometimes in such crooked ways that the author might as well starts finding it difficult to remember what he is writing. That’s why we cannot frame irony as emotionless. Now a very good way to experience satire for oneself is to make skewed and discombobulated sentences and try and guess how many meanings they have. THE ABOVE SENTENCE CAN ALSO BE A JOKE TRY AT YOUR OWN RISK. But yes the way we pitch and hitch with our friends and how we use taunts and sometimes slang too are colors of satire. 

              One should just as an above average intelligence person should try and enjoy the gift bestowed by literature in the form of satire and leave the goofing around and kicking  em own bums to the sitcoms. With this I will end this tiring and mournful article and hope you guys, our decorated readers must have developed a sense of irony. HAIL ALL ANIKET FOR THY SAYINGS I SQAUNDER.

Gilli danda : A game played during the childhood days

               With  ACE encouraging and Mr. attention to detail Mr. chief ed coping up with my taunting and hilarious (well that’s what I think) manner I suddenly have found the nerve to try and amuse you on the aspects of one our jewels in the world of village games A.K.A. the games K.I.D.S play (hang on to my later articles for the full forms) and with no further adieu we are talking about GILLY DANDA (I have screwed my not existing image of a serious and mature writer and have worsened it with a game that is in  no way related to ADAMS GILCHRIST … Ohh lord may our readers find peace as I have recently occupied the right hand of gaurav and his fangs . BTW do you guys remember his rajneeti article?)

                Not continuing with long ass sentences which take a bum acing effort to keep the grammar right we legerdemain our way towards the remaining part of the article and blaspheme our reader with some more cursed words of irony. Well it’s a simple game played with 2 sticks, 1 long and the other shorter about 2 inches and tapered at both ends. After reading the above sentence I am forced to say that there’s nothing gay about the game. It’s all in your head. As soon as one mentions sticks and inches what is the first thing we imagine. DO NOT LOOK AT THE SIDEREADER FOR POINTERS, IF U TWO ARE READING FROM THE SAME DAMN PAPER YOU HAVE CROSSED THE LINE FIRST. Well the game goes like this, first you try and topple the small stick in the air by striking it with the big one on the edges. Then while in air you hit as F^*KING hard as possible the smaller piece and try to send it to the moon. Failing thrice in doing so which is obvious you oblivious fool (theirs a tongue twister), you will end up with ZERO pts ding ding ding ding!!!!!! If you hit it and the others catch it …your OUT. If they all qualify for the Indian cricket team and are not able to catch it then where it falls u have to keep the longer stick and as they run to get hold of the smaller one the player has to return to the horizontally (between 2 stones you moron) placed longer stick before others hit it with the smaller part. Success in doing so earns you points. And failure results in occasional slangs and cursing. Well according to me these are the best games for a pack of wolves or even with girls around, the some you can play with the least equipment and make that breezy cold clouded day a life time memory. SUIT YOURSELFS LOOSERS... Adios amigo 

Old games new players, newer locations

          Yeah!  So we all have colleges, and we all have friends. Many might not understand what I am intending to do, but today would like to discuss with you the time we really enjoy in our college lives. Yes, voila, true or not we all love the Bunks occasional (medicaps, strictler, fines: are some keywords to find my college) might be in my case. In this edition you will discover a whole new exhausting way to spend your upcoming chilly bunks. We all know the common amateurish games we played when we were kids. Hell!! Lets become one again.  

          Yes deflating all the melodrama “Have you ever thought to play games like sitolia or gilly dunda when you are on a bunk around the college’s lush outstrip “. If your answer is yes let’s rewind what the game is all about. DO NOT BE BAMBOOZELED KIDS OF THE MODERN ERA BY THY RULES THEY ARE NOT MADE BY THEE YEE JUST FOLLOWS. Well in the mesmerizing game of sitolia u first place 7 decreasing in size rock pieces in a stack and you divide 2 teams with as many as players as thy wish (enough shakes peering now). Now one team hits the rack with the ball and a player from the other team gets behind it to catch the ball. Each player gets 3 chances and a 1 tip catch the players out. If the ball collides and disturbs the stack and the opposition catches it then the whole teams out. NOW our main aim is first to hit and scatter the sitolias then to reconstruct the stack without any member of the team getiing hit by the ball (which the opposition always tries). One who scores 7 pts first wins. NOW THE MORE YOU SCREAM, RUN, DIN THE MORE FUN U HAVE. 

           According to my emotional(not really)  highly satirical (most likely) assessment of the human nature , the pleasure you get to hit a friend hard with the ball or at em gives us boys a kinda unexplained happiness in whose pursuit we keep on playing and enjoying our asses to the fullest.

P.S. if only boys play the chants of slangs makes the game an immemorial experience!!! But we can enjoy it with all friends and foe (if you know what I mean) with all fervor and verve.